Josh and I after a long ass climb to the summit of Stone Mountain in Georgia.

Ah, Tuesday, November 12, 2013, that was the day I officially found out I had breast cancer. Finding out you have cancer sucks. It also sucks extra hard when you’re at a conference that you’ve been REALLY looking forward to. It’s hard to be super dorky and enjoy the Confab Conference when you’re struggling with shit like “there’s malignant cells in your lymph node. But, we don’t have any additional information about stage.”

This whole thing started a year ago. I found a lump in my left breast, also known as Lefty. I made an appointment to see my PCP for a physical, it was December 2012. I mentioned the lump, and she examined it. There was nothing to worry about. So, I didn’t. It would hurt periodically, but eh, I figured it was normal. After all, a doctor had taken a look at it. They do all those years of medical school.

Fast forward to October 2013. I was sick with a cold. I started having more pain in Lefty and having a burn sensation across my chest into my armpit. I also noticed a lump in my armpit. I figured the lump in my armpit had to do with being sick. After all, I had a cold. I remember when I was a kid that would happen sometimes. Having asthma and a cold, to play it safe, I made another appointment.

Little did I know, that appointment lead to a diagnostic mammogram and ultrasound. In the waiting room, before the diagnostic tests; I was in denial. I was looking forward to going to that conference. I figured it couldn’t be that bad. The lump in my breast was maybe a cyst or at worst, a benign tumor. The lymph node in my armpit had to do with being sick.

I tried to keep a positive outlook. Even though, there was a woman in the waiting room crying. I looked at her and felt bad. I thought, wow it must suck to be her. I wondered why she was freaking out. This is just the testing part. None of the pieces were clicking. Yup, I must be that stupid or woefully ignorant.

Looking back, it just seems like hey I’m too young. After all, I’m 34. I didn’t have any of the signs you see on those breast cancer awareness pamphlets; I have no known family history.

After the ultrasound, the radiologist said that it was suspicious and I would need a biopsy. They could do the biopsy right now. After that, the whole situation was surreal.

Thank you modern technology. I could find out that shit was about to get real for me via ultrasound and use google hangouts to talk in real time with my sister, Vanessa and my husband, Josh. I let them know it’s not looking good, I probably have cancer; they want to do a biopsy immediately.

Of course, technicians can’t officially tell you that you have cancer. Sure, they went to school to be able to tell the difference. But…they’re not doctors. They just do the imaging or take the samples.

But, they didn’t have to say anything; I had a pretty good idea. You know it’s bad when people are already acting like you have cancer. Very sweet people, doing the best they can. It’s impossible to know bad news like that and act normal. I did get some consolation juice and cookies. So, hey, it wasn’t all bad.

For the next few days. I knew but I didn’t. I packed, hopped on a place to Atlanta and tried to act and live as normal as possible. Josh and I enjoyed the Southern hospitality and continental buffets. We decided to visit Stone Mountain Park.  It  had some touristy parts. But, they have lovely park grounds, and we really enjoyed it. There’s also a freaking mountain smack dab in the middle of the park.

We decided to climbing the one mile up Stone Mountain which is 1,686 feet above sea level. Sure, one mile sounds easy enough. Nope, that sucker seems easier but it is all uphill. Sooo.

While walking/hiking, Josh and I talked about the impending diagnosis. I can still appreciate the cheesiness of us climbing a literal mountain while facing the prospect of dealing with breast cancer.